Last-Minute Oscar Predictions

The 84th Academy Awards will be held tonight at 7pm!!! Not that I care … ya know, ’cause I’m gonna be cool and hate on the Oscars. Well, not really. We all know the awards have their issues, but along with a vast majority of movie lovers, I have always enjoyed the ceremony, year after year. And with Billy Crystal taking the reigns once again, it should be quite the show.

* I skipped the Best Animated Feature, Documentary Feature, and Short categories, considering I haven’t seen a single film in any. Plus, this post is already quite late. You know how it is.

Best Picture

What Will Win – The Artist

  • It’s been over 80 years since the first silent, Best Picture winner – Wings. It is inevitable for everything old to become new again, so expect this fact of life to be exemplified by The Artist, a shoe-in for the film industry’s most coveted statuette, and a loving tribute to the era that started it all.

What Should Win – The Tree of Life

  • Terrence Malick’s crowning achievement is pure experience, an emotional, visually astonishing evocation of humanity, the universe, and cinematic art. So naturally, it doesn’t have a chance.

Best Director

Will – Michel Hazanavicius, The Artist

  • The French director’s crafty replication of an outdated art form provides him a surefire win. Malick won’t show up anyway.

Should – Martin Scorsese, Hugo

  • If it wasn’t for his “honorary” win for The Departed, Scorsese would have a running shot. He should, considering the great American director has iterated his love for film in Hugo like never before.

Best Actor

Will & Should – Jean Dujardin, The Artist

  • Silent acting is a completely different form of performance, and Dujardin, who embodies the style with utter charm and expression, will surely win the Academy’s heart, becoming the first Frenchman to win Best Actor. However, the race is very tight with George Clooney’s flawless, heart-wrenching performance in The Descendants, which I almost want to root for. Who ever thought he would be the underdog.

Best Actress

Will – Viola Davis, The Help

  • After her supporting win for Doubt, Davis has the best shot for her confident, emotional performance in The Help, a tear-jerking film of tolerance and empathy. Streep has a chance, but the Academy may now understand that she doesn’t have to win everything.

Should – Rooney Mara, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

  • Mara was the best thing about David Fincher’s atmospheric, surprisingly lifeless adaptation/remake, making a well-known character her own and providing intrigue where the film provided none. Plus, she looks great with nip piercings.

Best Supporting Actor

Will & Should – Christopher Plummer, Beginners

  • Although I have yet to see Beginners, I find the concept of Plummer as a 75-year-old gay man who finally comes out to likely be the performance of his career. The Academy will no doubt agree, granting Plummer his first Oscar in a category that often honors lifetime achievement.

Best Supporting Actress

Will & Should – Octavia Spencer, The Help

  • Spencer’s witty, moving performance nearly stole the film from Davis! The Academy will likely try to make history, awarding two African-American women in the same year.

Best Original Screenplay

Will & Should – Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris

  • Although Woody rarely attends the Oscars, it would be wise of him to show up this time. His witty, romantic, and thought-provoking script turned into one of his greatest and most successful films, and will surely be given its due.

Best Adapted Screenplay

Will & Should – Alexander Payne, Jim Rash, Nat Faxon, The Descendants

  • Some hate the narration, or the emotional disconnect that may or may not occur in some scenes, but it all comes to back to a screenplay that is undeniably humane, unique, and beautifully written. Plus, it will make the voters feel better about not giving Clooney the top acting prize.

Editing

Will & Should – The Artist

  • The superimpositions, titlecards, and transitions are straight out of 1927. Perfectly executed nostalgia that won’t go unnoticed.

Cinematography

Will & Should – The Tree of Life

  • Emmanuel Lubezki’s camera takes a God-like presence in a film that portrays both the creation of the universe and a striking memory of family life with equal profundity. Not giving The Tree of Life Best Picture is predictable. Not awarding the most sensational camerawork in years would be a sin.

Costume Design

Will – The Artist

  • Hollywood loves to give itself a pat on the back. Remember when they wore that? Consider your tux golden.

Should – Hugo

  • As creative as clothing can come, Hugo‘s costuming actually makes you think about how the film’s visual components work together, producing visual poetry beyond anything in recent memory.

Art Direction

Will & Should – Hugo

  • The Paris train station is not only a societal microcosm, but along with the film’s other sets, a triumph of production design that may be one of the best in cinematic history.

Makeup

Will – The Iron Lady

  • If Streep doesn’t win Best Actress, the stuff they used to make her look like Margaret Thatcher certainly will.

Should – Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2

  • Makes them look past puberty! Oh wait…

Original Score

Will & Should – The Artist

  • Ludovic Bource’s score lends emotion-provoking sound to a beautiful silence. Whether the scene requires peppy fun or utter turmoil, the compositions are pitch-perfect.

Original Song

Will & Should – ‘Man or Muppet’ from The Muppets

  • Against a song from an animated bird flick, Flight of Conchords‘ Brett McKenzie should take the cake here, even though there were better songs not even nominated, including others from The Muppets. Now if only they would let the furry critters perform live.

Sound Editing

Will – Hugo

  • Whether above a bustling train station or cast within the enveloping chords of a silent movie theater, Hugo creates an immersive world not only through visual design, but also sounds that makes us look around to see where they come from.

Should – Drive

  • If you bastards are gonna nominate the year’s best action-arthouse film for nothing other than f***ing sound editing, it at least feels good to know you “understand” how incredible the audio actually is.

Sound Mixing

Will & Should – Hugo

  • If my history is correct, no film has won Sound Editing and lost Mixing. Do the voters even know the difference? Insert troll face here.

Visual Effects

Will – Rise of the Planet of the Apes

  • One word – Caesar!

Should – Hugo

  • Scorsese undoubtably proves that once in a blue moon, 3D doesn’t have to suck. But James Cameron already got that credit for Avatar, so I wouldn’t bet on a win here, even though Scorsese arguably uses the effect in an even grander way, enhancing a film about more than … well, 3D.

 

See you on the red carpet!

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